she sat staring at the painting
for hours on end
sitting in silence in disbelief
convinced the woman dressed in white
sitting on the red cushioned bench and observing
the painting on the museum wall
had not existed upon her last visit
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
it’s inevitable
this final stand
never knowing
when it will begin
nor end
some say
they saw it coming
but in reality
such god-speak
is unnerving
what truly flies
contradicts
ordinary time
like a starship
on its virgin flight
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
Flags & banners
a singular spirit
a collective grievance
marching past
graffiti-lined walls
and underpasses
leading up to the hill
demanding the final pieces
be put into place
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
It must have been around ten o’clock
at night on Christmas Eve
and I was staring out the small
north facing window at the end of my bed
What are you doing my brother asked
I’m looking out for Santa Claus I said
Oh little man number one he’s not gonna be
here for hours & number two he won’t step
foot in this house unless he knows everyone
inside is fast asleep
I remember crawling back under the covers
thinking how my brother must be full of shit
wondering how in the world I could ever
possibly fall to sleep
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
how fare thee well
& other pleasantries
pass along throughout
the social gathering
—like in a dress rehearsal
each one repeating their lines
without fanfare
as if in a rut
—nobody listening
to what the others say
all having already read
each & every part in the play
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
I put on my running shoes
and ran
it was sunday morning
but the fog said otherwise
I ran and disappeared into nothingness
later somebody told me I saw you
but then you were gone
as if engulfed by nature
swallowed by low-lying clouds
that had swooped in like a murmuration
I said I didn’t intend to return
but then the sun appeared out of nowhere
burning my eyes
it was then I ran blindly back to where
I had started
but the important thing is you returned
somebody said
yes of course I replied
I felt like I had no other choice
considering how I still appeared to be alive
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
should I try to rhyme
or stay on the sidelines
my petty thoughts
reminding me of many faults
as a child or teen
or burgeoning adult
how time seems not to count
[in the grand scheme of things]
passing by on land or sea
or by way of angel wings
carrying me to places
I’ve been meaning to see
such as the wilds of timbuktu
or the colors of xanadu
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
the old woman is counting
her blessings
which are really young chickens
running around the grounds
with little to no supervision
in the barn her granddaughter
is counting eggs before they hatch
there are over 100 eggs
the granddaughter tells the old woman
who is rocking slowly in her chair
acting as if the number must be accurate
refraining from repeating an old adage
she herself learned as a little girl
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
Where do I begin
describing the beginning
to the end—what business
of this is mine
Something or someone tells you
you’ve been here before
—so very long ago
What kind of ending is this
intimate believer of the faith
—Angels from heaven visiting you
night after night
helping you
up & down
the staircase
—saving yourself enough strength
to prepare a cooked egg
atop a slice of toast
After an exhaustive night
you don’t remember a single one of them
—but somehow their names
repeat over & again in your mind:
Raphael
Jerahmeel
—and of course Michael
How they feed you bits of wisdom
and you nod & repeatedly say:
yes I know
yes I know
I remember you saying so in the dream
Soon
—soon child
—patience will reward you
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
you are young and a girl
you are allowed to show your
radiant face to the world
but I’m afraid those days
are fleeting my dear
I am telling you this for the first time
and you must listen to your mother
so that when the time does come
you will have known
the dos & don’ts
whys & wherefores
allowing you to act in your own
best interests
however with that said
I pray this day never comes to pass
how I wish it wasn’t so
how I wish you could remain a girl
showing your smile & intellect to the world
each & every day
from this moment on
long after I am gone
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
In totality
the impending fury
becomes unstoppable
until nothing is left in its wake
when lies parade the streets
as truths
marching in lockstep with hypocrisy
it’s only a matter of time
before conversations expand
exponentially
clawing at and ripping apart
said supposed truths
and so the forest fire starts
as a single spark
long before the inevitable
is about to take place
taking down
in an instant
that which was thought to be
forever sustainable
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
What do you call your apparent
isolation —like a hummingbird having
the feeder all to herself
until eternity
or like a soldier dislocated
lost in the jungle
desperately needing
company
even after being found & rescued
now so desperately alone
in the bustling makeshift hospital
at the ballgame
your mind wanders onto the field
your body remaining
in the bleachers
where you believe nobody sees you
when home alone
you pray for the rain to come down
relentlessly
like nails pounding into concrete
drowning out the very idea
someone is attempting to make contact
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
I had a fever
knocking me down
to my knees
calling me to rise
above a dark past
I had a fever
prohibiting deep sleep
forcing me to face
long nights
in restless rebellion
I had a fever
bringing to light
dedication required
to escape
interminable realities
I had a fever
nearly killing me
sublimely reintroducing
ancient energies
that lay in wait
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
seven years of bad luck
staring at me from the
rearview mirror
I was told I could never
look at myself in the same manner
in which I had grown accustom
that there wasn’t a mechanism
to put the pieces back together
—so I learned to get along anyway
as if living in an alternative world
one in which reflections
remain out of focus
only occasionally seen
from within
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
sun dance
joyful nature of arms & legs
extending spiritual energies
in wild abundance
in cheerful celebration
how the soul
conquers the moment
inspiring greater lives
to participate in movement
to dance & sing
it’s coming
don’t fret or worry
the universe highlighting
what needs healing
what the future beholds
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
lady of the mirror
calls you to retreat into reflection
back to the city center
where you once wandered the streets at night
or deep into the forest
where sights & sounds remind you
of a life before this one
she tells you what you crave
is a nonjudgmental environment
one in which your own
reflection
reminds you of the stars that shine
revealing all the many things
you are certain to find
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
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