it’s 7:17 pm
and if I wanted to
I could find my own shadow
as for now
I’m content staying homebound
where I sit & wonder
where my shadow could be
in a perfect world
your shadow never leaves your side
omnipresent like god herself
who will one day
add yours to her collection
april two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
let’s see
what haven’t we talked
about recently
that might make you
reposition yourself
on the settee
I carry out a tray
two cups & a pot of
earl grey tea
warm banana bread
& two thin slices of
lemon on the side
we talk about how
your dead mother
comes in & out of your life
promising [one of these days]
to leave behind
a dozen monster cookies
she knows how much
I love them
she goes on to say
sipping on her tea
& repositioning herself
on the settee
april two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
how many times have you done
yourself in. two, three, five, eight.
if it’s the latter man oh man
be careful where you step.
are you still driving a car.
you might want to rethink that.
in fact you might want to start rethinking
a whole host of things, such as
what’s for supper and when is bedtime.
do you remember where you put your teeth,
your eyes, your ivory handled pistol.
and what about renewing your licenses:
fishing, driving, hand gun, voting.
how exactly are you
planning on doing all of that
in your forever current state of mind.
april two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
I was collecting rocks
outside the outer perimeter
humming along ‘californication’
and randomly selecting
which ones go in the satchel
and which ones get booted
I was on a solitary mission
assigned by a power
I imagined existed
and when I returned to base
with only the best samples
I was rewarded handsomely
april two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
the best of intentions
isn’t that what we say
when things go astray
when all we can do
is regret & retract
or perhaps request a do over
are you in fear of your life
for what you might say
the interpretation of your words
landing on the wrong side
of the tracks
far too many little matters
have suddenly become
major life & death cases
intolerance running rampant
in far too many places
preservations & sanctuaries
fighting to maintain the balance
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
the bluebells were transplanted
long ago & they’ve been through
their ups & downs
you could say they were borrowed
and never returned
living & dying lo these many years
sometimes posing
other times shying away
as if not caring to be seen
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
when’s the last time you heard
‘nothing will ever be the same’
a model axiomatic phrase
if there ever was one
now we are all wondering
when in the hell you’ll be leaving
because as much as we wanted you
to be here in the first place
now we do not
we were all taught not to back down
but now we are at a crossroads
having finally come to understand
you are simply passing through
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
she told me she felt sharp as a tack
I told her I felt the same way
hours since have gone by
and nothing has really changed
it was as if we were inside a bubble
and everything around us was beautiful
you know that the bubble is imaginary
she went on to say
and I told her that I know that it is
as I lie on my back
poking at it with my big toe
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
I’m not sure if I hear anything or not
lone sirens in the distance
somewhere a baby’s cry
a happy sparrow in the tina crab
I turn to look & there is nothing left
I’ve been down this road before
taking a right turn at the tee
plucking invisible clues along the way
a certain sound or maybe silence
triggering all sorts of memories
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
I was poring over the google map
finger tracing past the sanctuary
and the prison
heading straight to bridge out road
we were seeing red
that’s for sure
going faster & longer than ever before
me gripping the wheel like a maniac
and you relaxed
in the passenger seat
drawing on a one-twenty cigarette
the hand-cranked window rolled down
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
it’s electrical
the way the whole world lights up
that is until it does not
protestors with signs
walk the streets at night
chanting the world is ending
chanting the end is near
some of them feel cheated
others vindicated
a small minority honored
to be included in the end times
some of them wondering
if it will be like the snap of a finger
or a slow & painful death
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
do not be afraid of returning
if that is what you want to do
snapping fingers & singing
hallelujah baby hallelujah
there is joyousness
in the physical & the beyond
a mysterious balance of
mind memory & cosmic fantasy
exclusively brought to you
via the next best artificial intelligence
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
I don’t think we want to take this road
from what I understand it goes straight down
or perhaps that’s exactly what we need
a thousand miles per hour descent
especially designed to take away our breath
having reached the penultimate destination
I can tell you the water from the tap
is very sweet to taste
I can tell you that the road
from this point forward offers anything
the mind can conjure
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
listen
it’s how they start their sentences
as if I wasn’t planning on listening
in the first place
if I listen too closely
to your voice
I may lose my connection
with mother earth
so I’ll slightly let you in
as long as you don’t speak
too long or too loud
I reiterate I don’t want to lose
my connection
which is more important to me
than having to listen to the likes of you
but again you say listen
insisting your words be heard
as if they were somehow being censored
by some force beyond your control
as for me though I’m tired of talking
so don’t even bother listening to me
for I’ve nothing left to say
not today
not tomorrow
not ever
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
another missed opportunity
whatever the hell that means
obviously it wasn’t
supposed to happen
there is nothing to see here
whatever may have gone down
has moved on
like a violent storm
leaving you in awe but alive
I’ve become blown away
by the world around me
the one attempting
to tear me into jagged pieces
and box me up like I’m somebody
else’s latest & greatest challenge
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
there is a divide
between how we got here
and whether a history
stained from the beginning
matters or not
how do you fix something
that’s always been broken
even though at the time
people believed
in what they were doing
living in interesting times
has become so passé
I want to start living
somewhere in the future
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
jdubqca 