one fresh lemon and frozen peas
carrots & celery & radishes
those are the easy ones to remember
instead of making a list
I try to recall what’s in the fruit basket
lazy susan and freezer
if only I didn’t have to stop at the pharmacy
everyone hates me there
plus they have my number and long memories
I rarely go down the middle aisles
afraid I may never come out
instead stick to the edges
where I can see real people
peddling real ideas
I tell my text-by-psychiatrist
that I’m not a druggie and never was
but I do like to get high
in the strangest possible ways
and most conspicuous places
she tells me to go on but I don’t
believing she’s really not a she
but rather an under-age sex-bot created
by four freshmen software engineers
at iowa state university
I sort of come back down to earth
when the bell rings and they ask me
if I found everything all right
leaving me scratching my head
and fumbling for my car keys
january two thousand nineteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
This is great. A total riot. The sex bot section, this:
“I tell my text-by-psychiatrist
that I’m not a druggie and never was
but I do like to get high
in the strangest possible ways”
Fantastic piece.
Thank you very very much 😀
This really cracked me up. I’m having so much fun reading it multiple times. I hope it’s all true — especially that hilario part about the pharmacy. 🙂
Of course.
Incredible, for sure.
I really laughed at: everyone hates me there (no one could hate you!)
haha thank you but don’t be too sure, Trace! thanks for sharing this one on your twitter timeline, it’s much appreciated!
I try and keep up with you!
a great peas of writing!
Thank you, Bonnie!
This was a super fun piece to read. Loved it!
Thank you so much, Jennifer, I’m thrilled you enjoyed this one!
Hope you send this one out for publication.
This really made me smile, John. I love how versatile your poetry can be from lighthearted and humorous to profound and poignant. Have a great night, my friend.
Thank you for such lovely words, Loredana. Means so much to me and makes me smile and heart warm. Wishing you and yours a wonderful 2019!
You’re welcome, John! And Happy 2019 to you and yours as well!