jdubqca

poetry by j matthew waters

Archive for the tag “nightmare”

that which awakens


you arise out of nothing but from a dream
the kind that wakes you up
a dream that starts out
innocently enough
moves along pleasantly from one idea to the next
but then a sudden turn of events
two children
two brothers
attending a professional baseball game
given enough leash by their parents
both reaching for a foul ball
arms stretching out over the concrete wall
leading down into the concourse
the two of them catching the ball together
grasping for dear life
fans cheering them on
but they’re leaning too far
momentum preventing them from stopping
from leaning too far
leaning too far and falling
holding desperately onto the ball




march two thousand eighteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved

undeliverable packages


we’re not expecting any fireworks
this year are we
she yells from the other room

(I think she’s talking to someone
on the goddamn phone again)

why in the hell are you asking about
fireworks I yell back
it’s only january for fuck’s sake

but it’s too late
the package has been delivered
and the driver has gotten away

it’s strange how silence
can be so deafening

it’s difficult to fall into a deep sleep
eyes routinely blinking
like an old film projector
telling silent stories

eventually the movie ends
usually in a whimper
and I slowly reach consciousness
only to discover the time of day

it’s four a.m. and
somewhere I hear a mother crying



january two thousand seventeen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved

I dream alone


I swear I was wide awake
and drinking heavily
toasting george thorogood
and his glorious destroyers

we polished off the pony keg
a few hours before
moved on to bourbon and scotch
knowing there was more
rhythm and blues to be heard

later into the night we
found ourselves securely insane
in the backseat of an orange
nineteen sixty-seven mustang

we pretended to be carrying contraband
deep inside enemy lines

halfway across the centennial bridge
we empowered the traffic
to stop (with our minds)
and I jumped and shouted obscenities
and escorted my party to the other side

scaling the eight foot tall fence
I swore I was on top of the world

(reaching back I surrendered my weapon)

free of such burden I would soon realize
I always dreamed alone


september two thousand fourteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved

sometime before the sun


I awoke violently
as if someone had grabbed my
shoulders and shook me
with all their might

Gasping for breath
as if dying or coming to life
I recall striving to push my imagination
from beneath the surface
out-chasing the nightmare
that is the unborn

Within the darkness
I hushed myself back to sleep
pretending nothing
ever happened to the sun




december two thousand thirteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved

never-ending is the night


visions arrive in feverish shapes
testing my sanity
in a darkness protected from a
cold november rain

flashes of restlessness appear
out of no where
reminding me of a dogged past
certain to hound me again

voiceless visitors with a certain
je ne sais quoi
talk me into believing
this night will never end


november two thousand thirteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved

to your rescue


i saw the fear in your eyes
coming straight at me
in a paralyzing dream
leaving me forever afraid
to call out your name
in the dark of the night
as i lay shivering
and dripping wet
wondering if my lovely angel
had gone to your rescue



november two thousand twelve
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved

The Last Bullet


The last bullet
was intended for me
came out of nowhere
like a flash of light
its irresistible spin traveling
some two thousand miles per second
much faster than my mind
could comprehend

The last bullet
remained lodged
in my brain until the day came
when I could no longer believe
I had beat it
could no longer replay in slow motion
how it had arrived there
night after night

march, two thousand twelve
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved

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