Sometimes I’ll ask myself
what would Bukowski do
and sure enough
I find myself back at the track
having a beer
& studying the program
in the back of my mind
calculating how much I might
possibly win
but more importantly
how much I couldn’t
afford to lose
december two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
the fire must have gone out
in the middle of the night
and whoever was responsible
for keeping it going
was nowhere to be found
outside the snow drifts
nearly reached the eaves of the garage
and opening the front door
would probably—to say the least
be a bad idea
out back the barn doors
were wide open & banging
against the wall
both horses out of their stalls
the sleigh also missing
gazing out the front bay window
we noticed not one chimney in sight
had smoke billowing out of it
and suddenly
we became frightened
november two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
tell me why
the air is so stifling
suffocating my every breath
as I lay dying
for the third time
in as many nights
my heart at rest
and barely beating
tell me why
I keep awakening
with a sudden spasm
an invisible hand pushing
against the dead weight of a body
refusing to move
as if signaling
tonight is not the night
september two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
political violence seeps into
our children’s dreams
concealed as spiders
& snakes
—when they awaken
talk of wounding & maiming
enter their mainstream conscious
even killing
if that’s what it has to
come down to
september two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
going off the grid
appears to be
the easiest way to escape
all the violence & insanities
surrounding us
—and even then
even then there’s no guarantee
we’d still be alive
in this war-infested world
yet another year
february two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
we were watching cartoons
in the dungeon when the doorbell rang
considering the volume on the television
it was surprising the sound even reached us
suddenly there was complete silence
except for half a dozen beating hearts
the shadows on the walls didn’t make a move
in fact they seemed to be shrinking
we weren’t supposed to be there
and there wasn’t a single adult around
for some strange reason Timmy decided
to see who was at the door
we heard every single creak of the stairs
as he ascended to the main floor
we heard his steps across the floor
stopping at the foyer
and from that point on
we never heard from Timmy again
january two thousand twenty-four
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
they say there is safety in numbers
an old adage likely apocryphal
this day & age
wherever people gather
there exists this potential
for mass devastation
whether by nature herself
or the acting out of malcontents
I suppose from the dawn of time
humans have been unable
to control themselves
whether it be the insatiable desire
to reach for the stars
or thirsting to destroy
that which we fail to comprehend
october two thousand twenty-three
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
they come to the door
and ring the bell
they are the uninvited ones
I sit in the corner chair
off-white insulated curtains drawn
the bulb of the table lamp
barely buzzing
the brightless ones move on
but I suspect
they’ll return again
more capable of interaction
the next time around
turning off the light
I nod off in near silence
a dimly lit moon rising
whispering something sweet
into my ear
promising to awaken me
as always
january two thousand twenty-three
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
talk to people without using words
paint them a picture instead
the heartless climbing stone walls
long in line getting permits to eat & drink
permits to seek & destroy and sail away
now you are telling your story
using gestures & wild wild sounds
making the floor tremble ever so slightly
making your unbelieving eyes see further
than they’ve ever seen before
this coming down to earth business
will one day come into play
but until then there is much unearthing to do
for what lies beneath the surface
is not as scary as you were led to believe
march two thousand twenty-one
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
I liked how the crow’s nest was within
walking distance from my place
its pink rooftop like a beacon
calling out my otherworldliness
Intellectuals and up-and-comers and
has-beens frequent the place
sprouting post-modern hallucinations
by way of fermented imaginations
Of course I am an outsider with a
photographic mind and a microphone
picking up prose and poetry
that seems to reside on the airwaves
Sitting unnoticed at the dark end of the bar
I systematically imbibe local ale
memorizing their stoic faces
second-guessing my unfounded fears
october two thousand seventeen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
summer’s promise has been smashed into
irreparable pieces
swept into the gutter along with man’s mortal sins
unable to be washed away
even by torrential rains
the pursuit of happiness is just a dying thought
riddled with contradictions
kings clench their fists and promise
real change will come
but the people in the streets shake their heads
weeping for the dead with brooms in hand
that all men are created equal they know
to be untrue
as are the history books justifying
the massacre of native peoples
and the legality of human slavery
oh America why have thou failed so many
foolishly feeding
the machine of mass destruction
your people afraid to leave their homes
a people starving for peace and love
and understanding
unconcerned with hollow words
on an idle document
july two thousand sixteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
this never gets easy
this guessing game with no
real answers
written on the back of cards
how many times do I
just get in the car
looking for something
that doesn’t exist
how many times do I
open a door
just because I think
somebody is knocking
that thing around the corner
it’s pretty fucking scary
some of the time
and sometimes it’s more than scary
and that’s when you understand
just how alive you really are
so I hear this weekend is
supposed to be super nice
I suppose I should take advantage
of the situation while I still can
february two thousand sixteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
the flight across endless waves
remains forever lost
the passengers abandoning time
in a downward spiral
their minds suspended
in horrifically incoherent thoughts
as an oceanic escape hatch welcomes
their translucent deliverance
into an alien world
march two thousand thirteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
there i was sitting in english class
talking about the duality
of holden caulfield
when all of a sudden the television
hanging in the corner of the classroom
awakened like a jolt of lightning
and the doors suddenly closed
and automatically locked
twenty of us just sat there in silence
removing the oxygen
from the dead air
and i recall thinking how everything
i’ve accomplished up to this point
was going to hang on tightly
as i slipped through the little window
stepping into a brand new life
february two thousand thirteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
screams crescendo down
the narrow roadway
bouncing off adobe walls
of old townhouses
bodies racing recklessly through the corridor
as arms and legs
flip exaggeratingly
propelled into the air
by the jerk and thrust of enraged bulls
whose nostrils snort fear
and blast steam
january two thousand thirteen
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
I hadn’t been afraid for so long
that when the inevitable came
knocking at my door
I checked my pulse
and let the shadow in
an eerie thought cooled my palms
and sharpened my eyes
leading me to believe
I was on the verge
of losing my sanity
I issued a self-restraint citation
against my worse judgement
barricading myself
in the confessional
waiting for a priest
december two thousand twelve
copyright j matthew waters
all rights reserved
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